Guilty yet thankful

Recent wks have been a whirlwind for me. My schedule is hectic and kinda punishing.

I will wake at 7am, change, make up and leave home at 745am. Breakie with parents then at 815am, I rush into office. The whole day will be busy, either i am working on long-time problems or trying to resolve new problems that occur. 12noon is lunch time and I get an hr to breathe normally. 1pm start work and I will go all the way till 7plus-8pm. No break, just an occasional snack on apples or cereal. By the time I leave office, its usually 7plus and I will step into house after 8pm. On some rare occasions, i will leave before 630pm and go for a brisk walk to exercise, thats the time when i get to see the evening sun.

When I bath and eat, it will be almost 9pm. Then i will either do more reading or i ll decide to indulge myself n watch tv prog. Conversations with Daddy and Mommy are usually short and concise, and they will patiently listen to my grouses (if any) or we will discuss hows their day. To be frank, usually we talk in front of the tv, and I would be fast asleep by the count of ten > which means they dont usually get much out of me.

I am really guilty, like I have not been spending enough time with them. No more luxury time with Mom, she has to do grocery alone, eat lunches alone. No more shopping with her, unless its public holi. No more late night watching soccer with Daddy, unless I can yank myself out of bed. Sigh... I feel so bad...I am neglecting them. But they are so supportive, they do not blame me and still encourage me to work harder and not worry abt them :(

Life is really very short, what are my priorties in life? Career? Money? Family? I'll put up both my arms and legs to say: FAMILY! I treasure every min i spend with them, every word i say to them. In the past, when time was abundant, I would not feel the need/urge to talk to them, I find it very normal to spend time together; and sometimes, i even feel 'irritated' at the amt of time we 'stick' tgt. Now that time is a luxury, i really treasure every min, like its the most precious thing in the world. Money cannot buy me family time and work will not give me the fufilment that family time gives.

I often ask myself: if i sacrifice family time for work now; one day, when anything happens and they are not with me, can i still embrace my work and be happy?